Habits

I’m not sure how NaBloPoMo is going to go in the last week. I’m three posts behind at the moment, I have a seminar paper to give on the 30th, and my mother really wants me to come look at potential condos with her on the 29th since I’m her unofficial real estate consultant. I can make the time to write, but, as I’ve discovered over the last couple of weeks, doing so almost inevitably eats into the time I have for academic writing. It’s been hard to find a balance, and I don’t want to post something just because I have to- I’d like my posts to be thoughtful, to have a point, something for the reader to take away with them.

Here is an incomplete list of what is on my desk right now:

  • a recycling bag with old artwork of E’s that I had been hiding in the winter clothes bin until it was safe to put them in the recycling- I had to get them out when I dug out the winter clothes and I haven’t had a chance to take the bag out to the bin with me. If I put them in the recycling bin in the house he’ll find them again.
  • a bag from a Banana Republic Outlet store with a work shirt I bought at the start of November
  • a collection of completed schoolwork E. brought home last week that I’ve looked at but haven’t yet had time to decide whether any of it should be kept
  • a pair of waterproof mittens and a pair of waterproof gloves that I bought E. but have turned out to be ever so slightly too big- they need to go into his storage bin for next year
  • one pair of pjs that E. really has outgrown
  • three white shirts that need to go into P’s 2T bin (the rest of the newest round of hand-me-downs are in a box upstairs after being washed last night)
  • two onesies and a pair of pants that P. really has outgrown
  • the vocabulary quiz my students wrote on Tuesday
  • my teaching prep for the last two weeks
  • the textbook for my course
  • my good camera
  • my iPad and its keyboard
  • a hydro bill
  • two credit card bills
  • two packages with Christmas presents for the kids
  • three separate piles of receipts
  • E.’s report card
  • a library book I’ve read but I don’t want to return yet because I haven’t had time to type out the quotes I want to keep from it
  • a toy house my mother made for E. when he was two- I got it out for P. two weeks ago but she’s not quite ready for it yet
  • two felt flowers P. pulled off of the house that I have to glue back on before I put it away

I have said on here before that one of the biggest challenges I have found in going from one child to two is the lack of time to keep on top of what I call “life admin”.

So my desk has become a dumping ground, and every couple of weeks I freak out when I look at it and take an hour when I should be actually working to clear it off. It remains blissfully clear for the rest of that day and then, inevitably, things start to pile up again. (I don’t work at my desk, but I find it difficult to concentrate on work if I know it’s messy, even if I’m working outside the house.)

I don’t have a good habit for managing the stuff that ends up on my desk.

I don’t have a good habit for flossing my teeth anymore. I used to floss in the morning but my mornings are so rushed with getting the kids ready that I can make time to brush my teeth but taking the extra minute I need to floss seems indulgent.

I don’t have a good habit for cleaning the litter box. We have two and only one cat now, so if I miss a day occasionally it’s not a major issue, but I have been missing much more than the occasional day of late because I can’t figure out when to do it. I’m either rushing in the morning to get E. to school, wrangling both (tired and crabby and needing connecting time with me) kids by myself after school, or I’ve got the kids in bed and by the time I go down into the basement it’s so I can brush my teeth before I can go to bed and I’m so tired the idea of one more thing seems overwhelming.

What has become clear to me over the last couple of months is I won’t get anything done well if it’s not a habit. My brain feels like it’s running at its maximum capacity all the time. I can make to-do lists and plan my calendar and keep my agenda up to date, but I only ever stay on top of the things that have to be done in that immediate moment. I never forget to pay a bill. I (usually) get my library books back on time. I remember the permission slips. My kids have seasonally appropriate clothing at all times.

It’s the little things that need to be done on a regular basis that seem to be always slipping through the cracks.

Do you also struggle with this? Any tips or suggestions for me?

2 Comments

Filed under Butter scraped over too much bread (a.k.a. modern motherhood), Daily Life

2 responses to “Habits

  1. I try to do a couple of things before sitting down on the couch to veg for a few minutes before going upstairs every night after putting the kids the bed. Washing dishes is always on that list. I know that all you want to do is go to bed, but while you are up and about before you brush your teeth, you could do the cat litter. Or can Q do it?

  2. Have you read any of Gretchen Rubin’s books? (“The Happiness Project,” “Better Than Before,” “The Four Tendencies,” etc.) She is all about habits.

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