Ok. Here’s the deal.
The technician saw two gestational sacs.
In one there was a baby, measuring 6w2d, with a strong heartbeat of 127 bpm.
The other was smaller and empty.
The u/s tech tried (I think) to let us down gently.
“The doctor will explain it all to you,” she told us. “Sometimes they still develop. Sometimes they are just slow.”
Then she asked if we wanted a picture.
“I give you one of the good baby,” she said. “That baby looks perfect.”
While waiting for the doctor, I read my chart. I showed it to Q.
“That second sac is completely empty,” I told him. “It’s not going anywhere.”
Q. thought for a minute. “Maybe we should have told her that her telling us that second sac wasn’t going to keep developing would have been really good news,” he said at last.
He was right. As much as I have tried to get my head around the possibility of twins over these last couple of weeks, there’s no denying that when it was clear from the u/s tech’s measurements that the second sac was empty, I mostly felt relief. A twinge of sadness for the baby that tried to be, but mostly it was relief.
The ultrasound tech was really cheerful (she’s not usually- I’ve had many an ultrasound with her before). She printed us a picture. She said congratulations a whole bunch of times. It must be one of the only nice parts of their job.
Then we met with my doctor.
“That second sac isn’t going anywhere, right?” I asked.
He shook his head. He had been talking in terms of a “brother or sister for E.” I don’t think he would have mentioned it at all if I hadn’t asked him about it.
“There’s a very very small clot located right next to the gestational sac with the baby in it,” he said. “You’d have to really be looking for it to find it.” (I have no idea how they can find ANYTHING. I could see the two sacs- they were black blobs- but how she managed to see and measure the baby and identify the yolk sac and the heart is beyond me.)
“That, plus the empty sac raises your chances of miscarriage. I’d like you to aim for a very restful week. Do you need a note for work?”
I looked at Q. He sighed.
“I’ll teach your class tomorrow,” he said (one of the perks of a husband who works in the exact same field you do).
I’m not on bedrest (and I don’t know how I’d manage that if that had been the request given the toddler in our life). But I’ll try to keep my feet up as much as possible, and I’ll get someone to cover my duty day at E’s nursery school on Monday. The good news is he told me to start doing the Fragmin every other day. My stomach bruises are getting really ugly, so that suits me just fine.
I’m back in to the clinic tomorrow for another intralipid infusion, and then another ultrasound next Thursday. Hopefully that one will show the empty sac has been reabsorbed and the baby is growing well. If I’m really lucky the clot could be gone too, but I had one with E. (I think it was bigger but not as close to his sac) that stuck around for the whole first trimester and never caused a problem.
So. Good news for this stage in the game, but I feel very much still in limbo. It still seems tenuous, uncertain.
It’s going to be a long week.