The clinic just called.

My beta was negative.


I am an IDIOT.

From now on, nothing counts until the beta results come back. There are no ‘symptoms’. Everything is meaningless.

Damn it.

I really believed that it had worked. I thought I would be lucky. I thought maybe it could be easy this time.

What a fool I was.


Filed under 2.0 FET#1, Emotions, Medications, Second Thoughts, Symptoms, TWW

9 responses to “Blindsided

  1. I am so sorry. What a kick in the teeth.

  2. God I’m so sorry. Progesterone symptoms are such a mind f*ck.

  3. I’m so sorry. This is not at all what I imagined for you. Sending hugs and love…

    It’s not foolish to be hopeful and optimistic. It proves that you’re still alive. I don’t consider optimism to be a liability at all. The fact that you have even a shred of hope, with all that you have been though, is a testament to just how resilient you really are. Don’t give up- you still have one embryo on ice. Keep hoping for the best for that one. You are in my thoughts.

  4. Clare

    Damn. I’m so sorry. (((((Hugs)))))

  5. Sarah

    Oh no, I’m so sorry! You’re not an idiot – there is nothing wrong with being hopeful and optimistic. There’s not much more I can say other than this just SUCKS. 😦

  6. Man. 😦 I’m so sorry. This happened to me with one of my cycles; I was so convinced it had work that I was completely blindsided when the nurse told me she didn’t have good news. It was almost worse than expecting the worst.

    Progesterone is really, really good at making women think they are pregnant. You are NOT an idiot. Hold the hope; it’s still possible.


  7. Em

    Oh, no. So sorry. Just so, so sorry.

  8. Karen

    I’m so sorry.
    I just went through the same.
    I hope your next cycle is the one

  9. Pingback: 2.0 FET #3, 9dp5dt | Res Cogitatae

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