We had a much, much better weekend with E. this week.
Less hysteria about where I was (although there were definitely still moments, particularly when he freaked out when I went into the kitchen to get him food that HE HAD REQUESTED, where we just had to shake our heads).
And a new set of recurrent feedback loops.
E. still says (about a billion times per day) “Was a bit sad when Mummy left”, but now if we then say, “And then what happened?”, he says, “Mummy came back!” and the loop finishes on a much happier note. He talked endlessly about how he didn’t like it when Mummy went to the university, but if we asked him why I went to the university on Fridays, he would tell us that I had to teach my class. And he loved telling us that the weekend meant it was an “E. and Mummy and Daddy and E. day!”.
Yesterday he asked what day it was tomorrow and when I told him it was Monday, he thought for a minute and then. “Monday is a school day. Mummy does her duty day! Mummy stay all morning! Mummy go home at lunch time!” To which I then asked, “And what time does Mummy pick you up after lunch”, and he said, “Three-thirty” with a big grin. Then we talked about how he’ll be in the playground when I come to pick him up, and we’ll walk home together and have a snack and watch the streetcars.
This morning when he woke up, he knew it was a school day and we didn’t have forty to sixty minutes of hysterical crying as a result. He did once try to decide not to go, but he was relatively easy to cajole out the door. All the way to school we kept repeating that it was my duty day, that I would go home at lunch, and that I would be back at three-thirty. At school he was settled all morning- he stuck close to me, but he wasn’t worried about me leaving.
When it was lunchtime, I stayed in the cloakroom, and he headed off to wash his hands with his teacher.
“Do you want to give me a kiss goodbye?” I asked him.
E. turned and looked at me. His lower lip wobbled. “No,” he managed, and then he turned and walked through the door WITHOUT CRYING.
I was so proud of him.
Far out. We are getting there.