If wishes were horses…

I have had this lovely daydream for months, years even. It goes something like this:

Getting pregnant with E. resets my body. When I wean him I end up with a regular cycle. I get pregnant for the second time the old fashioned way- at home, with my husband, without the finest team of medical specialists money can buy. We get to be normal.

It wasn’t crazy to hope for it. I know people (and know of many more) who had their second child without any medical intervention after struggling long and hard for their first.

But it’s time to face reality.

While I may  have been great at being pregnant, it did nothing to sort out my PCOS.

I weaned E. in early June. And absolutely nothing happened.

When I had a physical in late November my GP prescribed progesterone to bring on a bleed, and agreed immediately to send a referral to my fertility specialist.

The clinic called on Friday. This week I’m going to call them back and make an appointment to sort out timings for trying for our much-hoped-for 2.0. I expect my f/s is going to want to run a bunch of tests before we do a FET, so I want them out of the way before we go to the UK in the summer. I want to be able to start a FET cycle in early September.

I’m glad to have options. I’m glad we know that something worked.

But it’s been really really hard to let go of that daydream.



Filed under PCOS, Second Thoughts

2 responses to “If wishes were horses…

  1. Nity

    This is something I wish for ALL THE TIME. And several infertility folks have gotten pregnant on their own… just not me. Sniff sniff. It’s very hard to let go of the daydream.

  2. Pingback: The longing…and the fear | Res Cogitatae

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