An ending and a beginning

Thirty-four months ago, Q. and I sat in an office at the fertility clinic, while a f/s asked us a whole bunch of questions about our medical history. I actually apologized for being there. You see, when I’d first pushed my gp for a referral, I’d assumed that it would take three months or more to get an appointment, as I knew this clinic, being downtown and well regarded, would be busy. So even though we’d only been trying for three months when I saw my gp (admittedly three months with absolutely no sign of ovulation), I still requested the referral. Yet less than a month later, there we were.

Our f/s didn’t think we were silly for coming in that early. She was happy to run all the usual first tests. She talked us through the various steps and treatment options that the clinic offered. She paused when she reached the last step- IVF.

“I don’t think you’ll end up needing IVF,” she said.

This wasn’t wrong of her to say. Given what was sitting in front of her- a 28-year-old female with a history of wonky periods and a 31-year-old male who seemed to be perfectly healthy, she was right to expect that we just needed a bit of help with ovulation and we’d be off. Q. and I were hesitant to jump right into IUIs. Surely we just needed metformin, maybe clomid at the most?

Yeah, right.

Our journey over the last three years has shown just how wrong we all were that day. How little we predicted of the path that was to come. If you could have told me then what would transpire, what the cost of treatments would be- emotionally, physically and financially- I wouldn’t have believed you. Or, if I had, I wouldn’t have wanted to continue.

Today, Q. and I sat in another office at that same clinic while our f/s, the one who had looked after us since that first IUI, wrote out the referral letter, took me off my remaining medications, beamed at the ultrasound report for our still perfect baby, noted that the blood clot in my uterus was resolving nicely, and then congratulated us, gave me a hug, and sent us on our way.

Today, we graduated. We graduated with healthy baby in my uterus, with 14 weeks of pregnancy under our belt.

I burst into tears when my f/s hugged me. It was just too overwhelming. Because I’d honestly never truly believed that we were going to reach this point.

I take synthroid for my thyroid, and a prenatal. I see my midwife at 16 weeks.

I am a normal pregnant woman.

I can’t believe I made it.



Filed under Emotions, Pregnancy

6 responses to “An ending and a beginning

  1. 🙂

    I’m so freaking happy to read this. On so many levels.

    And I remember the moment I ‘graduated’ too from our clinic. My RE was practically bursting with happiness.

    Congratulations, Turia.


  2. Oh, T. Look at you! Look at us! I was just tearing up reading your post, and remembering how far we have both come from that first appointment. I wish you nothing but the greatest joy in the 26 weeks to come. And when you meet that baby for the first time, well, there are no words. I hope you enjoy it to its fullest. Congratulations on graduating!

  3. Oh man, this is the best post ever. I love it! Congrats on graduating from the RE, you normal pregnant women you :).

  4. Congratulations!! So thrilled everything is going so well!

  5. Wonderful, wonderful. I am so glad that you got help early on so that you could slightly shorten such a long and difficult road.

    Congratulations on your graduation. You should buy yourself a hat.

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