Mantras (IUI cycle #4, Day 14)

Q. came with me to the clinic yesterday to keep me company, since it was Sunday morning and all (and also I think he wanted to have breakfast out and the clinic was a good excuse). Bad decision- the waiting area was chockers with slightly-stressed looking women. That’s usually a giveaway that I’ll be there for a while. And sure enough, with only two doctors on, and too few ultrasound techs, it took ages to get through. More than two hours.

But the good news in the end was I got my trigger shot! Turns out my two leading eggies got busy and did some growing. One was at 20, and the other at 17, and my lining was “beautiful” to quote the f/s who looked at my chart. She explained why my f/s uses the fe.mara and pu.regon together. Fe.mara concentrates on growing one or two really good follicles. So after my first pu.regon IUI cycle (with five eggies), I guess my f/s wanted to make sure I didn’t overstim. Fair enough. The fe.mara is the drug that messes with my moods, so if this round doesn’t work I might talk to him about altering the protocol. Assuming we do another IUI, of course.

And she wrote in my chart that I can only have blood taken with butterfly needles! I felt a bit silly requesting it, as the blood techs don’t have my chart in front of them, but I wanted written evidence if I had to have another fight with one of them.

So even though it took ages to get out of there, in the end it was a good day.

First IUI was this morning. Q. did his thing, I did bloods and ultrasound, and then we went to Tim Hortons for breakfast (this is now our routine for IUI mornings). Some days Q. sticks around for the procedure itself, but he didn’t today as he is under a lot of pressure with his research. Anyway, if this round works, it’s possible that he was actually there when we conceived because we tried on our own before we knew that the IUIs were going to be so soon. Oops. So his count was a little lower than normal (since we didn’t quite manage the ideal 48 hours of abstinence), but nothing to worry about.

I am so grateful that he comes to the clinic and does his thing without complaint. I know he doesn’t experience infertility the same way I do, and I know it isn’t a big deal in the grand scheme of things when compared with what I go through, but still. It’s not fun for him, but he does it. (He says it’s going to be good blackmail when the kids are teenagers and making our lives miserable…)

My eggies were at 19 and 23.5, so they were definitely ready to pop. I came home, chilled out for a bit, and then went to yoga. On the way there, and during the class I concentrated on loving my body, feeling fertile, full of fecunditas as Turia herself would have said.

I’m not usually one for mantras, or visualizations, even though I’ve heard all the stories of how it works. It’s hard for me to block out other thoughts and to concentrate on one thing. I think that’s why yoga is working so well for me- I can concentrate on the postures and my breath and forget about my day for at least that hour.

It was tough to keep chanting away in my head that I was fertile, ready to embrace new life, opening my womb. I felt silly.

But you know what? I think while I was silently chanting away, moving through a sun salutation, I felt the first twinges of ovulation.

So if this round works, I’ll sing the praises of positive thinking.

Round 2 is tomorrow. Wish us luck!

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4 Comments

Filed under Emotions, Medications, ttc

4 responses to “Mantras (IUI cycle #4, Day 14)

  1. Ashley

    Thanks for commenting on my blog:) I will be saying a prayer that this IUI works for you!! Maybe #4 is out lucky charm!! I’m going to add you to my blog list.

  2. Springroll

    Wishing you another awesome IUI, a sticky lining, and a happy two-week-wait ! I’ll be thinking of you, kiddo – fingers crossed!!

  3. Wishing you lots of luck!!! Baby dust!!!!!!!!!

  4. Mel

    Ok… I am just catching up on this cycle.
    Sounds like things went well!!! I am going to be thinking positively for you and hoping this one is the catch.
    And back to the comment from your endocrinologist about how PCOS patients do eventually ovulate?! BS! Maybe on some rare and random cycles, but it is very common for PCOSers to just go and go on endless cycles until their uterine lining finally breaks down on it’s own. And crap, even if you did ovulate at 40 days or something, your lining would be WORTHLESS! What a choade!
    *hugs*

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